Ricky, don't lose that number

Call the pope and learn what else he doesn't want us doing besides birth control.

While fixating on something virtually everyone does at some point as a matter of course, Santorum ought to ask about these other Catholic positions that he ignores. Illegal immigrants should be treated humanely. All needy families should get federal assistance. The death penalty is wrong. The federal minimum wage should be raised.

Rick's too busy,  I reckon, to note these church edicts, since he's a hall monitor watching the counter at Rexall to see who's on The Pill.

Here's your socialist president

Yes, he IS a negro. But under that darker skin some folks can't see past, Obama is a moderate who often veers into reactionary conservatism.

Case in point: His administration is going after medical marijuana.

If Obama continues to deny  medicine to people who need it (my strength, stamina and balance are exponentially increased when I hit the right therapeutic dose of weed), may he lose the election to a man who doesn't want married people using condoms during their sexy time.

For me and millions of others, this is personal.

Internet moving at the speed of a 3-wheeled westward wagon

More this afternoon.

They're coming for your condoms

Apparently the GOP doesn't understand sex drive. Or marital relationships. Or how sex is an integral part of many people's lives.

At least this guy doesn't get it.

On the "controversy" of insurance companies covering (gasp!) family planning: "Here we have millions of our fellow Americans unemployed, we have jihadist camps being set up in Latin America, which Rick (Santorum) has been warning about, and people seem to be so preoccupied with sex that I think it says something about our culture. We maybe need a massive therapy session so we can concentrate on what the real issues are.”

So button up, you slut. Al queda is afoot.

Cutting off your snout to spite your face

Which region of the country will benefit most from Obamacare?

Why, poorer people in the Southeast (who can't get over the fact the president is a Nee-gro), and the gun-slinging Mountain West, full of old white people who just want their country back (as they enjoy Medicare, the original American socialized medicine, and begrudge coverage to anybody else).

Bad postcards

Wish you were here.

She's gonna spring that door if she doesn't get her ass off it. Is that a porterhouse in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?

Alright, carry on.

Is this the Middle Ages?

Socially conservative Republicans (redundancy?) have a sad over insurance companies paying for a medical item used by the vast majority of American women of child-bearing age.

The same group, incidentally, doesn't blink at doling out Viagra like M&Ms to 80-year-old farts.

Gotta go, cherie. As a single woman who still might be able to get pregnant, I have to be fitted for my state-issued chastity belt.

The agony and the ecstacy

Appalachia might be the prettiest place on the continent. But it's always been hardscrabble and insular, and a contradiction in about every way.

Yeah, my home county is in red.

Love is in the air

Even on the day after Valentine's, hope springs eternal in the hearts of lovers everywhere.

Dogs and 'fetch'

Some amazing underwater photos of canines and their passion.

I'm back

Thank you for bearing with me.

I took a couple (extra) nerve pills and I'm good to go.

My world. . .

. . . is tilting on its axis. I may be a few days. Please check back.

Citizens in full

A disabled military veteran demands that her spouse (a woman) receive family benefits just like the rest of military wives and husbands do.

This is what equal treatment under the law looks like, folks. You can't say "Oh, thanks so much for serving, but your committed relationship is worth less than mine."

Christian porn

I wonder if it will all be in missionary position?

The Christianistas try to tap into the web's most popular phenomenon.

Horribly bad idea or brilliant idea? I can't decide. I might need to vomit first.

Cat and flute duet

Your 41 seconds of zen.

MJ

A Slate blogger picks apart why most Americans can't legally buy marijuana.

His conclusion: All that said, it’s clear time is on the smokers’ side. The pre-baby boom generation—the country’s last to grow up believing that marijuana was more likely to cause rape, insanity, and suicide than it was to promote passing out on the couch—won’t be a political factor much longer. Today’s middle-aged voters came of age in the 1970s, when marijuana use was even more common than it is today. Some may harbor reservations about laws that allow their kids and grandkids to follow their lead as tokers, but they’re far less likely than their parents to lump weed in the same category as more destructive drugs like heroin and cocaine. It won’t happen today, and it won’t happen in the next four years. Eventually, though, we’ll have our first weed-legalization president.

Offered without comment

Boycott Microsoft. And Apple. And Amazon. And STARBUCKS? Fuck that shit

The retail world is shrinking for those who put their money where their mouth is when hating on the gays.

As the above blogger notes, there's always Chick-Fil-A. And the Southern Baptist Convention, though I'm not sure what consumer goods they produce. Hard to fill your belly with "you're-gonna-burn-in-hell" tracts.

Note about the graphic: Homo Depot. Snicker.

Get gay married

Washington State steps toward legalizing gay unions.

Politics and ta-tas

Re: the dust-up between the Susan B Komen Foundation and Planned Parenthood.

Most of us have a friend or relative who has had an abortion, whether we want to know that or not. Women don't exactly announce the fact to the world. Abortion is here to stay, even if you make the procedure so difficult to get that only rich women have the option.

If you think otherwise--that no one in your  world has ever chosen to end a pregnancy--you are likely wrong. By the age of 45, 3 in 10 women will have had an abortion. 30 percent.

How many women do you know?

Valentine's Day

Did your heart throb into your throat (and not in a good way) when you read that head?

Yes, cheries. Feb. 14 is the holiday American adults secretly hate. All of us.

If you're single and don't want to be, you're surrounded by overt lovebirds. Those in committed relationships, meanwhile, are never sure what to buy/how to celebrate. Many males are scared they'll fuck up or forget (A relative of mine married his wife on Feb. 14, likely thinking he'd remember at least one of those dates. Canny, but what happens if he zones Valentine's Day and his wedding anniversary? The results might be life-ending).

Even casual daters and honeymooners aren't too sure. If it's your first Valentine's Day together, for example, would lingerie be an appropriate and appreciated gift? And even if you surmise yes, what piece? Is a lacy bra OK, a bustier borderline, crotchless panties beyond the pale?

Roses. The safe (yet sadly pedestrian) gift.

Why Newt might hang on

In the map below, Gingrich carried pink counties and Romney yellow.

In Florida, the northern part of the state aligns with the South culturally, while the southern two-thirds is decidedly not "Southern" in the same way.

Newt might play kingmaker (or even get the GOP nomination) if he hangs on until more Southern states hold primaries.

It's a bird. It's a plane. It's Super Kitty to the rescue

Video games help the war-burned

Injuries from fire have figured prominently in our wars in Afghanistan and Iraq.

The burned service members find pain relief in an unlikely place--virtual reality video games.

Kittens and football

What more do you people want? Felines are in charge of halftime at the Super Bowl.